Anne

Effort & Laughter

Little Anne squeezed my index finger with her left hand (affectionately known as lefty) ever so slightly today! i have asked her to do this repeatedly since May and she has never been able to muster even so much as a wiggle. But today, something in Anne’s brain connected. God is slowly bringing back function!

We have noticed that little Anne seems to be learning a new skill – effort! We see now when she really tries hard to move her legs in her walker, she holds her mouth wide open and cocks her head a little sideways. You can see the effort on her face. When she applies herself she really moves forward – literally :-) She exerted this same great effort when i was asking her to squeeze my finger. GO ANNE!

Anne continues to make us laugh. We were putting her to bed, and pretending to make Anne into a pizza. This is a silly family ritual that involves lots of tickling and squeals as we ‘stretch the dough, apply the sauce and toppings, and put the pizza in the oven (couch) to bake.’ When we finished and Anne was exhausted from laughing, it was time to eat the pizza! As we were pretending to gobble her up, she said very sweetly, “But, I’m a person.” We just laughed and laughed!

-eric and kathryn

Bobbi Jo Brooks Photography

Our church is blessed with lots of gifted people – one of which is Bobbi Jo Brooks – who graciously photographed our family a few weeks ago.

She’s posted a few pics on her blog. She was able to catch a few great shots of Anne!

courtesy of Bobbi Jo Brooks Photography

You can see the pics here!

Only a week?

Has it really only been a week since we got Anne’s gait trainer?  Seriously, only a week?  Last Thursday seems like a lifetime ago – Anne has changed so much…

Anne's Rifton Pacer

She’s walking SO much better now.  She loves to walk to the piano, and then I turn her around and she walks back to the sofa.  The other night, she wanted to quit, but we encouraged her to walk as fast as she could to the sofa.  When she finished, Eric hugged her and said how proud of her he was.  Then Anne said, “I’m proud of me too.”  YES!  She put forth EFFORT!  AND had the self awareness to feel proud of herself!  We’ve been praying for that :-)

Another thing…  Anne was able to sit in my lap – without moving – just relaxing for almost five minutes.  That might not sound like a big deal – but to me, it’s HUGE.  There is something about Anne’s injury that prevents her from sitting still. While she was in the hospital, she could not relax in my lap – she would constantly want to sit up.  And she’s done the same thing at home – not being able to just sit in my lap – but always wanting to change positions.   This week, that’s changed!  I’ve so enjoyed Anne’s short bouts of stillness!  You don’t think about the gift of a relaxed child in your lap, until – well – your child can’t relax – but Anne is improving :-)

Anne’s also doing really well with her new speech therapist.   Therapists are people – with different personalities and gifts, and some have meshed well with Anne, and others – well, not so much.  This therapist is able to pull the best out of Anne.  We’re very thankful for her!

I’ve learned alot about sensory processing issues from this SLP (speech language pathologist).  Anne struggled with sensory processing before the accident, and it’s only magnified in her now.  I’m excited for Anne to start working with an OT in the area that has extensive experience with Sensory Processing Disorder.  I’ll probably write more about that later…

But for now, it’s obvious that God is working mightily in Anne!  She is emerging more and more.  Getting angry, showing excitement, demanding her way, kissing Canon, correcting Kate, and saying, “I love you Mama.”  :-) 

The joy she brings makes up for all the hard work of caring for her.  We’re very grateful in the Jackson house these days!

-kathryn

Not quite ready for the big time…

We’ve only had the gait trainer for a few days, and she’s already made great progress. She took a few more steps by herself today than yesterday, and is slowly learning how to balance and move her body in space.  The gait trainer is awesome, because it helps to retrain Anne’s brain to walk.

I believe Anne will be able to walk into church one Sunday …she’s just got to practice a lot more before she’s ready for the big time!!!

-kathryn :-)

Rifton Pacer Miracle

One thing that I’ve wanted for Anne at home has been a walker. Anne’s not quite ready for a simple walker just yet. But, a couple of months ago, when Anne was being fitted for a wheelchair, just for fun, they tried Anne in a gait trainer. A gait trainer is a fancy walker with lots of options for support. You can attach a pelvic support or a trunk support, arm supports, ankle supports – and they can all be used in different combinations to customize the gait trainer for the child.

When Anne was in the Day Rehab program, I asked about getting a gait trainer for Anne at home, but it just didn’t work out…

Enter Anne’s new volunteer PT. She’s actually a professional PT in real life – she just feels called to help Anne. So when a vendor came to her work demonstrating gait trainers – she immediately thought of Anne.

After we talked, and I exclaimed, “That’s what I’ve been wanting!!!!” – she went to work, calling the manufacturer and then the local distributor hoping to find one that we could just TRY for Anne. After the PT finished telling Anne’s story, Charlene (the lady at the local distributor) said, “You tell Anne’s mom that she has a whole team of people working for Anne!” And the next day, Charlene emailed to say that they were DONATING a gait trainer to Anne!!!!

We went to pick it up today. Anne was treated like a rock star! All the employees watched and snapped pictures as she was fitted for the gait trainer. Anne turned to her PT and said, “Is it REAL that I’m going to be able to walk into church by myself?”

Anne has taken a few steps by herself today. We hope she’ll be taking much more in the near future!!

It is such an honor to be in the middle of all of these miracles that God has performed for Anne. He does this through HIS people, like the PT and Charlene and Anne’s speech therapist and through our church family and community. He continues to provide perfectly for sweet, little Anne. It’s all amazing.

PROFOUNDLY grateful! -kathryn

BTW: here’s the link for Anne’s new gait trainer. Rifton Pacer gait trainer

Life has been very good lately…

We had a wonderful visit with family yesterday. Eric’s family from France are in the States for a few days. As we gathered with everyone, Anne seemed more lucid. Her eyes were bright, and she seemed less impulsive than usual. It was a good time.

This morning, Anne’s PT visited. It is so clear that she is God’s provision for Anne right now. She spent extended time with Anne, and Anne seemed to perform well for her. The PT is genuinely excited to work with Anne which is so encouraging to me. She’s so knowledgeable and experienced. I’ve learned so much from her already!

One interesting observation she made was that Anne’s muscles have good strength and seem to work well. Her brain just needs to be rewired to move them correctly. This requires that we are consistent with her exercises. She seems to learn quickly – but she doesn’t carry over new skills from day to day. Repetition and consistency are very important for Anne – two things that I do not excel in.

So please pray that I might be disciplined to do Anne’s exercises and also creative to see ways I can incorporate ‘therapy’ into our daily activities.

One last thought. I’ve had more peace about Anne than ever before. I think it stems from two things… First, acknowledging that Anne is forever different is a step toward acceptance – which is one of the stages in grief. In other words, I don’t feel as weighed down by grief as much as before (that could change, but for now, it’s nice :-). Second, I feel like I’m resting more in God’s hand and plan for Anne. It’s easy to place my trust in good things – like therapy, nutrition or Anne’s progress – but ultimately, God has the final say about Anne’s life. It’s refreshing to find rest in God alone.

Thankfully, kathryn

A different Anne

This evening Canon and Kate built a little train in the driveway made of a bicycle and two tricycles. They connected all three with bungie cords. Kate and Canon rode on the first two with the third empty. Canon then stated enthusiastically: “when Anne is well, she can ride with us!” Kate and Canon had so much fun with great laughter as they rode in big wide circles while the funky train weaved back and forth with only moderate control. I so wanted little Anne to be a part of the joy that kids experience in this kind of play. . . . .maybe one day God will bring Canon’s wish to our minds as we see Anne playing with her brother and sister. . . . .

Since Anne has been home all day these past couple of weeks, Anne’s deficits are more apparent. Canon has been more sad and moody. Noticing the change, Kathryn asked Canon why he was feeling down. Canon said: “Anne just seems so different. I can’t play with her like I used to, and when I try to talk to her, she starts talking about something else.” …meaning that Anne has a difficult time staying on topic.

We’re all very sad that Anne is so different. She’s not only different because of her physical and attention deficits, but her personality has shifted as well. Simply put, all the intricate connections in her brain were changed by the injury.

On the flip side, we get to watch God build Anne into what He wants her to be. He cares for her more than we can imagine. He has already called an OT, PT and Speech Therapist to work with Anne while she is home. These women individually felt God calling them to use their skills to help Anne – and stepping out in faith, God is using them to richly bless our family!!

-kathryn and eric

Smart Girl!

We have a little game of riddles that we play as a family. I read the following riddle and ANNE guessed the answer before Canon or Kate had any idea. See the bottom of the post for the answer: “After a shower you may see someone who is wet holding me. Like wind in your hair you feel me, but much more controlled you will be.”

Canon and Kate were trying to remember the verse 2 Peter 1:21. While they were struggling, Anne spoke up and said it perfectly! We all just looked at each other and all hugged Anne!!

We have noticed that little Anne seems to have all of her smarts and intellectual ability, but her capacity for appropriate responses can at times be hidden behind her inattention and impulsivity.

Our little Anne now has the distinguished crown as the LOUDEST person in our family! It is really quite amazing considering that for so long Anne was so flat, monotone, and quiet. Now, she is so the opposite. So much joy and emotion. She really loves to yell and scream for joy with laughter and smile. She really gets excited when we play music!

We are praying for:

  1. Anne’s oral fixation, impulsivity, and inattention to decrease
  2. Standing and walking
  3. Anne’s heart to be filled with God

answer: hair dryer

eric

He Knows.

Yesterday I wrote about how I was anxious about the unknown….

This morning I read from the devotional Jesus Calling. (It’s written with Jesus in the first person, as if He were talking to you.)

October 6
Be willing to follow wherever I lead. Follow me wholeheartedly, with glad anticipation quickening your pace. Though you don’t know what lies ahead, I know; and that is enough! Some of my richest blessings are just around the bend: out of sight, but nonetheless very real. To receive these gifts, you must walk by faith – not by sight.

From the beginning of this journey until now…. God has always shown up at my lowest lows – to remind me (in a very personal way) that He knows. He knows me; he knows Anne; he knows what was, what is and what will be. He knows; He is sovereign, and He is good; therefore, we will trust in Him.

Thank you for praying with us – for Anne’s healing and for our family to walk by faith and not by sight.

-kathryn

Graduation time!

Tomorrow is Anne’s last day of Day Rehab. They’ll even hold a graduation ceremony for Anne at the end of the day!

The Day Rehab program has been excellent for Anne, but Eric and I both feel good about Anne moving to the next phase of her therapy. She’ll transition to more traditional out-patient therapy. She’ll also go to Kindergarten in the public school system – where they are more equipped to serve Anne.

I don’t know what our new normal will look like. It seems like we will be juggling lots of therapy appointments with school and rest. Poor Anne still gets so tired.

We’re praying that God will bring just the right people into Anne’s life that He can use to push her forward in her recovery. She needs firm, kind therapists and teachers. She needs an especially good speech therapist that will help her reach her potential as she continues to struggle with low attention and increased impulsivity.

There are so many unknowns. I have felt very overwhelmed this week. God has met me through the kindness of friends who drop everything to come help me do laundry, or watch the kids or bring me lunch.

Even though I feel anxious about all the unknowns, Eric is so good about reminding me of what is true. God KNOWS – and He is doing good for our family.

Thank you for praying with us… for just the right people to help Anne – and for the grace to believe in God’s good plan for Anne and our family. Thank you – kathryn