Pray for our transition to home…

It’s interesting how the dynamics between Canon and Kate have changed while Anne has been away… Canon and Kate are both more easy going and fun loving than Anne. Before, Anne was the little “director,” telling Canon and Kate just what characters they would play in that day’s version of pretend. Canon and Kate rarely fought. It was typically passionate Anne that sparked conflict with either Canon or Kate.

Now, Canon and Kate fight constantly. There are obvious reasons for this – as their world has been turned upside down – and all the grief and anxiety plays out in their bickering. But alot of their conflict simply comes from Anne’s personality not being here to direct them. It’s as though they are lost without their director to tell them how to play…

I think it will be equally difficult when Anne comes home…

Physically, Anne is the equivalent to a six-month-old baby (with only one working hand). She sits, but is still wobbly. She explores with her hand – grabbing everything and putting it directly in her mouth. She can feed herself with her fingers, but can’t use a spoon or fork. She requires diapering and has to be carried everywhere.

Cognitively, Anne expresses herself with the simplicity of a two-year old, yet has more advanced people skills than even her old self. She has lost her shyness, has impeccable manners, good conversation skills and a sweet smile :-)

Please pray for our whole family as we make the transition to bring Anne home. I will have to lean on Canon and Kate to help me keep Anne safe. Kate might have difficulty having more of a “big sister” role with Anne – especially dealing with her physical limitations. Please pray for us all to adapt to our new family life.

Despite the challenges that are ahead, we’re still very excited :-) Two days ’til Anne comes home!!!

Expectantly, kathryn

An end to fussiness

Anne has had an especially good few days. She’s sitting and standing better. She’s also got more fluidity in her walking movements.

I think the largest improvement has been in her fussiness. Over the weekend, Eric thought she might be constipated, and boy was he right! The cork came out on Monday and now we’ve settled into a rhythm… Each afternoon, she gets fussy; we give her a supository; she has a bowel movement, and voila – she’s calm and quiet the rest of the evening. It’s amazing actually!

Originally, today was supposed to be her discharge date. I’m thankful she has one more week… She’s improved so much just in the last week. I think I’m ready to bring her home.

Our prayer requests from Tuesday are still relevant today…

  1. that Anne would gain more control over her thoughts so that she is better able to focus in therapy and communicate her needs,
  2. that Anne would continue to make strides in her sitting and walking. She’s doing much better in these areas…
  3. Currently, Anne puts EVERYTHING in her mouth. Pray that she will be able to inhibit this impulse and gain appropriate function of her right and left hands.
  4. That she would be especially aware of God’s presence and peace as she struggles through her recovery.

Gratefully, kathryn

Thank you…

I’ve been much more encouraged over the last two days.

I realized yesterday that Sunday (6/13) marked 2 months since the accident. Anne has made an amazing recovery for only two months! Many people have told me that they are praying for my emotional and physical perseverance. I feel like God has given me a second wind :-)

Thank you so much for your prayers.

Please continue to pray…

  1. that Anne would gain more control over her thoughts so that she is better able to focus in therapy and calm herself at night,
  2. that Anne would continue to make strides in her sitting and walking. She’s doing much better in these areas…
  3. Currently, Anne puts EVERYTHING in her mouth. Pray that she will be able to inhibit this impulse and gain appropriate function of her right and left hands.
  4. That she would be especially aware of God’s presence and peace as she struggles through her recovery.

Thank you! -kathryn

Feeling weighed down…

I’ve put off updating the CaringBridge site because I don’t feel like there’s anything exciting to report… I guess that’s the nature of Anne’s injury… recovery is slow. I’ve been struggling with impatience lately :-)

I still feel weighed down by the fact that my sweet girl has such a serious injury. Today she looked at a picture of a black dog, and she called it a sheep, and then a horse, but couldn’t find the word “dog.” She has to concentrate so hard to answer such simple questions.

She’s working just as hard physically. Today her PT asked her to bend her left leg. Anne was laying down flat on a mat. You could see her jaw clench in concentration as she raised her left leg straight up, and then after a few seconds she bent her knee in a jerky motion. She repeated this for the therapist a few more times – each time having to concentrate like crazy just to bend her knee.

As I watch her, I feel this strange mix of joy and sadness – I’m so proud of her, but grieved to see her struggle so…

God does give me glimpses of joy. Yesterday evening, a bunch of family came to the hospital to eat dinner together. There was cheerful banter as everyone ate burgers and fries in Anne’s room. Anne just sat gazing at everyone with a content smile. The only reason we were together was because of Anne. That’s a gift that’s come out of this tragedy.

And then today… I took Anne for a walk. Anne can reach up and touch all the buttons for the elevators. I thought back to Anne’s first day in rehab. Her therapist asked her to push a HUGE yellow button. We all cheered as the therapist had to place her hand on the button and she was BARELY able to press it down. She’s come a long way to be able to so easily find and press the elevator buttons! That was a sweet reminder from God.

Perseverance – emotional and physical. That’s our need right now :-)

Please pray:

  1. That Anne would gain endurance and not tire so easily. When she tires, she gets extra emotional, so also pray that she would be able to regulate her emotions.
  2. That Anne would make great strides both cognitively and physically in the next 10 days before her discharge date – specifically that she would be able to sit unassisted and communicate consistently what she wants and needs.

Thank you! -kathryn

Fear

I’ve been thinking alot about Anne’s progress… She’s come a long way cognitively, but physically, aside from head control, she hasn’t shown much improvement over the last 3 weeks.

I think she is struggling with fear. She cries whenever we lift her or move her. She cries when they stand her up or work on walking. She even cries when she is sitting – unless her back is fully supported. EVERYTIME I pick her up, she says to me, “Mommy, promise you will never drop me.” I think if she can overcome the uneasy/unsafe feeling she has when she is moved, she will make great strides physically.

Please pray that she will overcome her fears.

On a different note, Canon and Kate have both had stomach viruses over the last few days. I really pray Anne, Eric and I do not get it – especially Anne!

-kathryn

Discharge date…

We have a discharge date… two weeks from today: 6/17.

We are both excited and nervous. Eric is mostly excited; I am mostly nervous :-)

I’m overwhelmed by the prospect of bringing Anne home as she is now. I want her to be so much further along, but she does have two full weeks. Alot can happen in two weeks!

I think it will be good for the whole family to have Anne home. Canon and Kate are starting to tire of being away from both home and mommy so much. And I think Anne will benefit from being at home.

Anne’s next step after she is discharged is Children’s Day Rehab program. She’ll be in a rehab facility (just across the street from the hospital) five days a week from 9am-3pm. It is a drop-off program that is like school with much structure and group activities. We still don’t know if or how much our insurance covers, so please pray that God will provide either through insurance or other means.

In the interim, we’re praying for God to give Anne a major “boost” (Canon’s word) in her healing, so that caring for her at home will be more joy than burden for the whole family. Specifically that she would be able to:

  1. Sit completely unassisted.
  2. Improve her cognitive/thinking abilities so she can focus for longer periods of time and be able to calm/organize her thoughts so she can verbally express herself more clearly.
  3. Gain greater control over her right hand – so she can feed herself, and maybe even color a little bit :-)

These are my hopes for her before she comes home. She’s already come so far – Two weeks ago she hadn’t spoken her first sentence and her eyes had just started to move. I pray God surprises us in these last two weeks!

Thank you for walking this journey with Anne and our family.

-kathryn

Happy Birthday Kate!

Last night went well. Eric decided that Anne was probably in pain. So after some pain meds and the idea to turn on her favorite music… Anne calmed right down and slept without a peep all night. God is good to answer our prayers :-)

Today was Anne’s little sister Kate’s 4th birthday!

The birthday girl :-)

We had a Dora-the-Explorer party at the hospital. Many of my friends pitched-in to help as we explored all the play areas in the hospital. It was great fun.

Dora's map

Kate's cake

My prayer two weeks ago when I started planning Kate’s party was for Anne to be able to participate with us. My vision was Anne riding along in her chair – following the action with her eyes, smiling and talking a little.

That was a lot to hope for two weeks ago… That Sunday (5/16) she was crying most of the day (b/c of too much medicine), her eyes were fixed to the right, and aside from an occasional smile, she was virtually unresponsive.

Today she participated just as I envisioned. She interacted with her friends and I think genuinely enjoyed Kate’s adventure of a party. It was wonderful!

Anne with her friends

Please pray:

  1. For Anne to get stronger both cognitively and physically. Anne has to work hard to answer questions about a picture book and she still can’t sit unassisted. She has a lot of hard work ahead of her.
  2. For us to continue to stay in the present – remaining dependent on God and trusting in His good plan for Anne.
  3. For Anne to have a profound awareness of God’s love and care for her.

Happy Birthday Kate!!!

5-30-2010

 

-kathryn



A day of extremes…

5-29-10

This morning, I’ve never seen Anne look so good! But, this afternoon, Anne started to regress.. We don’t know why. Her left leg started shaking alot and she is unconsolable – extremely fussy.

Poor Eric is staying with her tonight. Please pray that God gives Eric insight into what is troubling Anne – and for God to help them both cope tonight. Pray for rest and peace.

God is worthy to be praised when Anne is good. God is worthy to be praised when she is not so good. He is our Sovereign Lord.

-kathryn

Hope…

Anne has done amazingly well following her surgery on Tuesday. It’s hard to pinpoint specifics – she just seems more herself. She’s talking more, holding her body and head straighter – she seems to have more strength in her legs and her hand is not quite as crazy-acting…

For the first time, it feels safe to hope. I’ve always had hope – but only in God’s good character. Now, God is allowing us to see His healing hand in Anne, and that inspires me to hope for greater things to come.

Our days are not so heavy. The heaviness of her constant crying has been lifted. She’s now pleasant. She uses all of her manners (yes mam / no mam) and even has a sense of humor.

The heaviness of uncertainty has been lifted. God has fulfilled our deepest desires for Anne… allowing light to shine in Anne’s eyes and allowing her to speak. I tell her, “God is helping you to get better and better everyday.” She always responds, “Even today, mommy?” “Even today,” I say :-)

Finally, the heaviness of grief has been lifted. They encourage parents to post pictures of their children on the outside of their doors. After three weeks on the rehab floor, I’ve come to a place where I can look at a picture of Anne (pre-accident) and not grieve. So now her door has lots of pictures :-)

Her door with pictures

Jeremiah 29:11

We still have a long way to go on this journey, but I’m thankful for God’s grace to lighten our load a bit. Anne’s smiles and constant chatter produce in us a profound gratitude for God’s mercy. To God be the glory.

Please continue to pray:

  1. For Anne to pass through this phase of oral fixation. She puts EVERYTHING in her mouth. I know it’s a phase, but I need patience to wait through it :-)
  2. For Anne to continue to get stronger. She still can’t sit unassisted.
  3. For Anne not to be discouraged and to lean on God in a deep way.

So thankful!!! -kathryn

Anne’s out of surgery

The procedure was very successful. She will be in the ICU for a night or two, then hopefully back to rehab. She is experiencing pain now. She is saying OUCH alot and crying some. She is reaching for what is bothering her on her head – the many, many, many staples holding her scalp together.

Kathryn and i were so worried that she would not be herself for some time after surgery. . . . but she is already talking a little, holding our hands, and opening her eyes wide to watch us!! PRAISE GOD.

The primary nurse during Anne’s iniital stay in ICU is her nurse today – she was amazed at how great Anne looks and was blown away when she heard Anne speak!

Please pray:

  1. that there will be no complications from the surgery – no infections, no issues with the bone replacement, etc.
  2. that she would be able to get back to her rehab schedule tomorrow or the next day 
  3. that she would not be in any pain

-eric